If You Can’t Say Anything Nice…

Mom Library likes to quote the old adage “Weddings and funerals bring out the truth in people.”  Wow, that’s for sure.  Of course, for the longest time, I thought she meant this regarding family members and close friends.  Oh no, my friends; it’s much more global than that, for better or for worse.


Exhibit A:  Old acquaintances.  This is one of the more positive times when people have come out of the woodwork to talk wedding shop.  Senora H, Mr. Library’s high school Spanish teacher (I took French next door), is one of the sweetest women to grace the hallways of our alma mater.  Seriously, they are lucky to have kept her this many years.  A petite woman in her mid-fifties, Senora has a way of putting people at ease and making them feel interesting.  When she saw that I was substitute teaching at the end of graduate school last year, she was quick to say hello.  After asking how Mr. Library and I were, she immediately asked about the wedding plans.  Both of her daughters had already gotten married, so she could relate to the different emotions and planning issues Mr. Library and I were facing.  It was wonderful to hear her side of each subject, being that she was a seasoned expert in Mother of the Bride.  She gave great advice, neat ideas, and a lot of smiles.

Exhibit B:  Coworkers.  This one is a double-edged sword.  Let’s start with the positive.  As of last weekend, there are three of us at my middle school who are getting married some time between July 10 and August 7.  I was the first one engaged and started off the school year with wedding planning already in progress.  A, my co-coach for field hockey, got engaged sometime in September and decided to get married the week before me.  M is the latest addition.  Her boyfriend proposed last weekend, and they decided immediately to get  married the first weekend in August.  God speed to her with planning!  It’s great to have people going through the same planning ups and downs at work, especially since we can just look at each other and know how it feels to plan EVERYTHING in the world.

The negative.  Luckily, this category is short.  It revolves around one particular coworker who has found the need to pick apart every wedding selection I have decided to share with her during our lunch duty.  This lady, who will be referred to as R, is a wonderful lady with a heart of gold, but she tends to have the mind-to-mouth filtering system of one of the Bravo Housewives of New Jersey.  When I mentioned that Mr. Library and I would be having our ceremony on a bridge, she turned her nose up and berated me for not having it in a “Jesus appropriate” setting.  Her words, not mine.  I also got a lecture on how weddings were a place to be civil and completely sophisticated, so our plans on maybe smooshing a little cake would be totally outlandish.  Well, chalk two up for being outlandish.  Now, in all of this, I never really asked for any opinions, so it was a little hard to take the negative.  I guess that’s the risk you take with sharing.


Exhibit C:  The completely, 100% eavesdropping stranger.  Oh, how I wish I were kidding.  While waiting in line for our H1N1 shots, Mom Library and I started talking about our To Do list for the wedding.  The woman in front of us decided to tell Mom Library that she “had no right to tell [me] what to do because [I am] the bride and you just can’t talk any sense into brides.”  Uh… do I know you?  This butting-in continued for the next twenty minutes until the offender’s phone rang.  Saved by the bell.

Which opinionated exhibits have you come across during planning?


One response to “If You Can’t Say Anything Nice…

  1. Pingback: If You Can't Say Anything Nice… « Here Comes the Blog | Planning Weddings

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